Mind the Gap! The space between who we are and who we want to be

What do you see when you look in the mirror?

When you look in the mirror, what do you see? Do you see someone that you love, someone that you respect, someone who you feel is living their best life?

Or do you see something less than you were looking for?

If you do, then you are just like a HUGE number of people who feel the same way….including me a few years ago.

You see, I have been trying to work out what it is I do….and yes, I know that sounds crazy but stay with me here….what it is I do to help people. I felt driven to define the work I do, beyond the catch-all term of “coach”.

Figuring it out

It has taken me weeks to work it out and it all seemed to fall into place when I stumbled across the words “mind the gap”.

This probably still isn’t making much sense so let me explain. Continue reading “Mind the Gap! The space between who we are and who we want to be”

Strictly Empowering Women – I am no Victim

The Strictly Curse

I love Strictly Come Dancing.  Seriously. I have the ringtone, my dog has a sequinned collar, Saturday nights are sacred.  I. Love. Strictly.

What I love less is the rumoured “Strictly Curse”.  The nonsensical theory that if you go on Strictly your relationship / marriage will die a grisly death.  The absolute certainty that you will surely have an ill-fated relationship with your celebrity dance partner.

A Sequin-Covered Bubble

There is clearly provenance here.  There have been many relationships forged through the hours of intense training that Strictly requires.  And hey, I get that.  It must be a very strange environment to exist in – like a sequin-covered bubble of glitter and sparkle and terror.

But the events of this week have surpassed anything I have ever seen in the 15 previous years of Strictly.

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The Importance of Satellites – A lesson about judgement

a lesson about judgementThis is a cautionary tale about judgement – as random and strange as that may seem at first!

It  is National Mountain Day here in the UK (11th Dec) and as part of the celebrations for this, there has been an announcement that scientists have confirmed that the UK has a new “tallest mountain” in its territories.

Now I know that this is not the kind of subject that you expect to see me write about but please, stick with me here because there is a point to this, I promise!

Mount Hope has been confirmed as the new tallest mountain in the UK-owned territories.  It turns out that she is a full 55 metres taller than anyone had ever thought she was.  Scientists have measured the mountain many times over the years, using all kinds of clever equipment.  But now with the use of satellites, it seems that she had been significantly under-estimated.  

This made me think – not so much about mountains – but about us and how we can so often make a judgement of ourselves or others that falls so far short of the reality. Continue reading “The Importance of Satellites – A lesson about judgement”

Christmas Party Season – Should I stay or should I go?

christmas party seasonFor many of us, Christmas is a time of joy and excitement.  A warm buzz of anticipation and a sense of family or community fills us and we feel good about life.

For some people though, Christmas looms like a problem to be solved.  And not always the entire thing…just elements of it.  For example, you may love the gift giving and receiving.  You might adore the atmosphere of love and wellbeing…but loathe the more social side of the season.

Does everyone enjoy a party?

The biggest trigger for a crisis of seasonal confidence is of course the “Work Christmas Party”.  The annual get together of everyone at your place of work – perhaps with their partners.  It sounds lovely to many people and let’s be honest, it can be a huge amount of fun.  But it can also be an intimidating and uncomfortable experience for anyone with confidence issues. Continue reading “Christmas Party Season – Should I stay or should I go?”

Frozen in Time – The Problem with Indecision

indecision - frozen in timeMany of my clients suffer with indecision.  Often it has taken them months to decide that seeking the help of a coach is the right thing to do.  That’s before they settle on choosing to work with me and not one of the many others they have found.

Being unable to make a decision can literally bring a persons life to a standstill.

I am sure many of us can recall a time when we have struggled to make a decision, especially around the bigger aspects of life.  But imagine if you were unable to make even the smallest decision without being overrun with doubt and anxiety.  What would your life look like then? Continue reading “Frozen in Time – The Problem with Indecision”

Self Confidence – Are you brave enough to be you?

Self Confidence - Are you brave enough to be you?I love making images with quotes for the Life Redesign UK Instagram account.  It is one of the more creative perks of my rather brilliant job.  And every now and then, I make one that I love a bit more than the others simply because it resonates with me.  Like this one which speaks of self confidence.

There is the obvious cuteness that it is a quote by a Disney character.  But that aside, it is one of those phrases that make you stop and think for a moment.

For the most part, I am comfortable with who I am but it hasn’t always been the case.  Certainly when I was much younger, it was hard to tell who I was on any given day.  I busily worked my way through various identities trying to find the one that fit me best.

That’s pretty common teen behaviour right?  We watch as young people sample the benefits of being a goth or a cheerleader.  As theyform relationships (platonic and romantic) that might best be described as ill-advised.  It’s all part of the rich tapestry of life and we know that eventually they will discover their self confidence, settle on who they are and a path will unfurl for them.

But what if we get to adulthood and we still aren’t confident in who we really are?  Continue reading “Self Confidence – Are you brave enough to be you?”